think i'm losin' it

Life took a giant step towards the crazy today. So much to do... not enough hours in the day.

S and I went out again tonight. I absolutely love it when I get to go out with him. Soooooo relaxing... I love just talking to him, it is like I am finally talking to someone who understands me. Sometimes it seems like there aren't enough people like that in this world.

My life in general feels so crazy right now. I think a big part of that is because I am living with my parents, and as a result I have a lot of stuff crammed into a very small space (i.e. my bedroom), and my mom refuses to let me buy any drawers or anything to organize it. So in general my "world" is just messy, and I hate that. Plus my TV is broken, and my mom refuses to let me buy a new one. And I hate that.

Know what I really hate? When my sister graduated, my parents bought her a laptop, and she had enough money to buy a car, free and clear. And when I graduate, I will be LUCKY to get a television from my parents. I don't have any money to buy a car, and I don't think my parents want to buy me a laptop. I don't know why. I guess it has something to do with money, and my sister was just lucky whereas I am not. Celebrate her graduation, but mine is not a big deal.

Anyway, I have this stupid portfolio hanging over my head, and my mom loves to make fun of me at every turn for not working hard enough on it. She's mad that I am not done with it (she is of the opinion that I should be done before thanksgiving and if not, that is just evidence that I am a slacker). So, I won't quit blogging entirely, but I may not be able to blog nearly as often as I would like.

Phooey. It's really hard for me to love teaching sometimes. I love it, I really do, but I have days that are really hard. Because it shouldn't be this much work. All I want is to graduate, and it shouldn't be this difficult.