crazy cousin, crazy life
*Sigh* I wish I knew what I could say or do for Linda. But it's useless - she won't even talk to me. There's a photo sitting next to my computer from the year we went to camp together. It makes me so sad. She's such a pretty girl, with so much potential... so sad that she is throwing all that away. I wish she knew how much she has disappointed so many people... myself, her parents, her brother, her aunts, uncles, her other cousins...
If she just believed in herself and her own ability to be herself! She doesn't need a boyfriend or a husband or a passal of children to be complete. Yet that's all she wants. She's throwing away everything - her hopes and dreams, her desires, not to mention her virginity, all for this vision, that if she gets married to Mark the cable guy, all her dreams will come true and her life will be complete. The only problem is, she's left God out of it, and her life will be emptier than it ever has been before!
I wish she knew how much she has broken my heart. I love her so much, and it just eats me alive to know she is doing this. I want to be sick when I imagine Mark touching her. Bunnyservant thinks I should write a letter to her, and honestly that doesn't sound like a bad idea to me, but I don't think my mother wants me to contact her in any way. I would do it anyway but I am afraid that it would somehow backfire on me, that word would get around to my family.
Stuff like this is what makes it so hard for me to have friends. I mean, I trusted her like I have trusted no one before, and I thought I knew her so well. I never in a million years thought she would date a wife beater like Mark. This is why I have so many secrets from the world. Bunnyservant knows my secrets, and Princessa knows my secrets, but will I ever be able to tell S or any other member of the male species? Bry and Dennis know, but that's only because I have been friends with them since before I went to the hospital, and because they supported me so much during that time.
I hate the betrayals I've experienced. And though most of the time I don't mind it, sometimes I hate having the problems I have.
Time drags on. Another day, be patient, pray, and wait on God. Not easy.
If she just believed in herself and her own ability to be herself! She doesn't need a boyfriend or a husband or a passal of children to be complete. Yet that's all she wants. She's throwing away everything - her hopes and dreams, her desires, not to mention her virginity, all for this vision, that if she gets married to Mark the cable guy, all her dreams will come true and her life will be complete. The only problem is, she's left God out of it, and her life will be emptier than it ever has been before!
I wish she knew how much she has broken my heart. I love her so much, and it just eats me alive to know she is doing this. I want to be sick when I imagine Mark touching her. Bunnyservant thinks I should write a letter to her, and honestly that doesn't sound like a bad idea to me, but I don't think my mother wants me to contact her in any way. I would do it anyway but I am afraid that it would somehow backfire on me, that word would get around to my family.
Stuff like this is what makes it so hard for me to have friends. I mean, I trusted her like I have trusted no one before, and I thought I knew her so well. I never in a million years thought she would date a wife beater like Mark. This is why I have so many secrets from the world. Bunnyservant knows my secrets, and Princessa knows my secrets, but will I ever be able to tell S or any other member of the male species? Bry and Dennis know, but that's only because I have been friends with them since before I went to the hospital, and because they supported me so much during that time.
I hate the betrayals I've experienced. And though most of the time I don't mind it, sometimes I hate having the problems I have.
Time drags on. Another day, be patient, pray, and wait on God. Not easy.
posted by Tidy Bowl at
11:02 PM
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